Trying to put everything together: Last night when the hospital went dark, I was in my room going over the past--Late last summer when I started using the site as a blogging place, and it ultimately became one and more inclusive for all of your fans. However, last Summer was a whole lot more than that for me. I needed to remind myself of things that had happened with you, Chad, that weren't really seen by anyone else, but I know they happened. It was wonderful and crazy at the same time. However, at least for a while last night I was able to just sit in wonder and be in love with you without pain, without doubt, it just was what it was. JOY!